Stories Set in Imaginary Lands
We have started reading The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe.
Watch this film clip of Lucy entering Narnia for the first time.
The first half of the clip shows her entering Narnia and looking around.
How do you think she is feeling?
She then meets Mr Tumnus for the first time. How do you think she feels when she sees him? How would you feel?
I would like you to write a description of Lucy's first trip into Narnia.
We have been working on using adjectives and adverbs to add detail and description.
We have also been exlporing figurative language; metaphors and similes.
I would like you to include descriptive language, as well as trying to use a metaphor and simile.
You can put your post on the blog or bring it in on paper.
I look forward to reading your blog entry by Wednesday 22nd January!
she was feeling confused then she pulled the thing
ReplyDeletedown then she saw a door went inside then she felt so strange and so exsited and she had a wondered aroung the place and the she went up to the pole she heard a noise and mr tomnos was running lucy got a bit scared and they both saw each other and they gastped and tried to hide form them and lucy saw mr tomnos then lucy gave the box to mr tomnos and they were happy.
Hi Daniel, you have some good ideas but you must re-read it carefully adding punctuation like full stops and capital letters before publishing. Please edit and re-post. I look forward to seeing your improvements.
DeleteLucy was walking curiously to the cupboard. The cupboard was a hazelnut brown and a bit dusty. By the time she was at the cupboard she heard Edmond counting "1 2 3 4. ....".
ReplyDeleteShe knew that the only place to hide was in the cupboard so she stepped in. Inside the cupboard was several furry coats. As Lucy stepped down further into the cupboard she felt a prick, she turned around and before her a tall prickly tree was in front, she gasped and over there was another tree and another! She walked further in and then she realized she was no longer in a cupboard but was in a forest. It looked like a non- Christmas winter wonderland but no rides of course it also looked like a rather friendly forest. Lucy walked further in and soon made it to a black lamppost. A few minutes later she heard footsteps and out of the blue a man with a pointy beard and a red scarf screamed and so did Lucy. She hid behind the lamppost and the man is behind a tree. Lucy walked closer to the man and picked up the parcels he was caring. Soon the man stepped out from the tree, Lucy looked down at his feet but he wasn't wearing any shoes or pants? He had goat legs. Lucy asked “What are you?,”
“Oh me I am a Thorn half man half goat and my name is Mr. Tumnes” answered the Thorn.
Annabella, this is fantastic! I can find a few little errors (Can you spot them?) but overall the flow, vocabulary and style is fantastic. I like how you used a range of sentence openers, as well as remembering the 'new speaker, new line' rule. What else could you do to improve this piece of writing?
DeletePerhaps you could try adding in a simile or metaphor???
DeleteLucy was very curious when she got to Narnia through the cupboard. When she was at Narnia she
ReplyDeletewas very puzzled then when she was at the shiny silver lamp post. When Lucy met Mr. Thumnus she
screamed as alould as a lion at first then she helped Mr Thumnus with his heavy brown parcels with
a really big smile on her face.
Deesha, well done for including a simile! Can you add some adverbs. When discussing the emotions Lucy might have felt as she experienced things, try and expand on those points by telling me why, i.e, When Lucy arrived in Narnia she felt very curious because......
DeleteOr:
DeleteAs Lucy edged closer to the strange creature she felt.......
While they were playing hide and seek Lucy ran into an open room with nothing except a big old rusty wardrobe which before was cowered in a dirty mattress. She nervously flung the mattress and mirthfully creaked open the wardrobe and tardily went inside it. She walked backwards through the wardrobe seeing lots of big, warm, furry coats. Fresh air blew on her face and her hand felt something very spiny, which was a tree. She suddenly felt something soft and cold. It was snow in the middle of the woods; she merrily walked further into the snow covered white forest. She walked further and further into the beautiful land until she saw a lamp post from a distance. She finally reached the lamp post. She abruptly heard something running about behind the trees. She quickly hid behind the tree not wanting to be seen. The creature saw her and dropped the parcel and ran behind a tree. Lucy came out from hiding and picked the parcel up. The creature snatched the parcel out of her hands. Lucy saw that he had the legs of a goat and the body of a human.
ReplyDeleteShe curiously asked, “What are you and where am I?”
“You are in Narnia and I am a Faun. My name is Mr Tumnus”.
Wow Harshil, you have included lots of wonderful features (direct speech, adverbs and adjectives, complex sentences, engaging openers) in this piece of writing. I can see you also had a thesaurus close by. Do you understand the meaning of all this words?Try and include some of them again in next week's writing!
DeleteLucy walked in very timidly inside the room, she was amazed by the sight of a huge wardrobe and discovers what surprises it held inside. She thought it was just a ordinary wardrobe, little did she know that it would lead her to a magical place called 'Narnia'. She stepped inside and realized it wasn't a wardrobe but it lead to a forest covered with snow. She was delighted by the sight of snow, she was overjoyed, she was as happy as a clam. Suddenly, she heard the sounds of footsteps, she heard the trees howling and felt a shiver go up her spine. She turned around and saw a person that was half human and half goat. At first she was frightened but then she realized that the thorn was very kind and generous, she found out that the thorns name was Mr Tumnes, He saw her, she saw him and they both screamed at the sight of each other. Lucy and Mr Tumnes introduced each other and soon became friends.
ReplyDeleteLucy paced forward to the wardrobe. In the background she could hear Edmund counting. The only thing that came to mind was to hide in the wardrobe. She went to the back of the wardrobe and to her susrprise she could pass through and come out the other side. even more astonishing she emerged to find herself outsdie in the snow.
ReplyDeleteLucy must have felt very nervous being in such a new place. She might also have felt excited becasue it was somewhere different and she wanted to explore.
Lucy must have felt scared meeting a man with no real legs just goat legs . If I met a man with goat legs I would be very scared.I think Lucy was silly agreeing to have tea with a stranger
Lucy was wandering around the professor’s house when she went past an old and dusty wardrobe which caught her attention. She got curious, so she decided to go in. When Lucy walked slowly into the wardrobe, she felt something cold and damp underneath her feet and that’s when she found Narnia and Mr. Tumnus. Lucy felt astonished to see a half goat, half human creature standing right in front of her. Lucy may have felt frightened but if it was me, I would be very interested to know more about him and discover his unique qualities.
ReplyDeleteWhen Lucy entered Narnia, her surroundings felt as freezing as ice inside a cold, chilly freezer. She felt like she was in heaven because it was so white. She might have felt baffled, nervous and surprised of it and at the same time so eager to explore the magnificent beauty of Narnia. She then wondered if the wardrobe has magic.
The journey was exiting, nerve wracking, a bit scary but enjoyable for Lucy to have met new unique friends.
Lusy feel bravly when mr tummnes ran fast in to the wood.Mr Tummnes showen the way to the which cave.Then peter and her sister came and they found lusy but suddenly lusy so Edward got caught by the which in a slender.Then Peter saw three wolf.The wolf got one of the animal.The wolf was biting the animal.Then Peter took his sword and pointen it by near the wolf the wolf spoke to Peter then SUDDENLY Peter stabbed his sword in to the ice berg then the ice breg was start moving then peter lost lusy but lusy wasn't lost she was behind Peter.
ReplyDeleteHi Kawin, I can see you have thought carefully about what to write. Make sure you re-read it before publishing, checking for capital letters and that it makes sense.
DeleteI can also see you tried very hard with your spelling. Perhaps identify some spelling errors with a parent or sibling and correct those with a dictionary.
Are there any sentences you could extend/add more detail?
Lucy was wandering around the professor’s house when she went past an old and dusty wardrobe which caught her attention. She got curious, so she decided to go in. When Lucy walked slowly into the wardrobe, she felt something cold and damp underneath her feet and that’s when she found Narnia and Mr. Tumnus. Lucy felt astonished to see a half goat, half human creature standing right in front of her. Lucy may have felt frightened but if it was me, I would be very interested to know more about him and discover his unique qualities.
ReplyDeleteWhen Lucy entered Narnia, her surroundings felt as freezing as ice inside a cold, chilly freezer. She felt like she was in heaven because it was so white. She might have felt baffled, nervous and surprised of it and at the same time so eager to explore the magnificent beauty of Narnia. She then wondered if the wardrobe has magic.
The journey was exiting, nerve wracking, a bit scary but enjoyable for Lucy to have met new unique friends.
Wow Ray John you have really worked hard on this. I like your writing style, it feels very personal. I especially enjoyed reading about all the possible emotions Lucy might have experienced as she discovered the hidden world. I like that you added a simile and metaphor too! Maybe instead of saying 'She got curious...' you could have used it as an opportunity to add in an adverb, i.e. Curiously Lucy decided to go in....
DeleteLucy walked to the cupboard and opened the door and saw a hazelnut and then when she turned she saw this place covered with snow and then she walked and then she so some thing and then they were scared and then they talked and then they meeted each other and then they gave presents and then the thorn saidhave tea with me .
ReplyDeleteAshvin, well done for including details of what Lucy did, saw and felt and for maintaining the correct tense :) Re-read your work and think about where you could have ended a sentence and began another. Perhaps you could write it again this time including full stops, capital letters and some interesting sentence openers.
DeleteThank you to everyone who has so far completed an entry. I am enjoying reading them very much. Just one thing Mr Tumnus is a fawn, not a thorn! Hehehe
ReplyDeleteThanks to everyone who submitted their homework as a paper copy also!
ReplyDeleteAs Lucy entered the wardrobe she left the door half way open because she new it would be a stupid thing to leave it closed. She started walking backwards hitting the fluffy coats softly until she felt a cold crispy thing which felt as cold as ice that had been left in the freezer for 100yrs. She now turned around and befor her eyes she saw a snowy forest with trees all around the place but then she saw a lamp post she thought it was quite weird having a lamp post in the middle of a massive forest. Lucy started walking in and looking around to see if there were more things interesting inside. It looked as if she were looking at her new home. As she walked a little bit more in, she saw the white light from the sky shiver when the snow down untill it made a large heap of snow the place as if it had bin snowing forever there. She could hear all kinds of beards tweeting in the air on trees and in holes. The impression on her face showed that she wanted to explore much more than just the nearest parts of the magical wardrobe.
ReplyDeleteI think Lucy was amazed to see the enchanted and beautiful world that surrounded her. But when she saw Mr Tumnus she was scared as she had never seen a fawn. However, when she calmed down, Mr Tumnus asked Lucy politely to have some tea, and so she did, although Mr Tumnus was hesitant.
ReplyDeleteLucy bravely walked in the room and took the cover of the wardrobe , she entered the wardrobe and walked in to the very end until she felt something cold and then she saw a different wold. She anxiously left the wardrobe door. She saw a massive lamppost and put her hand to it. Then she heard a footstep she was nervous and wandering who could be there. She discovered it was thaun she then noticed this thaun was a bit clumsy because the thaun dropped a couple of pastles. Lucy kindly helped the thaun pick up the pastle but she was most eiger to find out what was inside. Then the thaun introduced himself and is name was called Mr. Tombus andf offered Lucy for tea.
ReplyDeleteInquisitively, Lucy approached the old wardrobe that stood alone in the dusty bare room. Perfect place to hide she thought. Carefully she pulled down an old light sheet, that was draped over the wardrobe like a cloak. It was like a deflating balloon as it fell to her feet. She slowly pulled at the black handle : a few white moth balls rolled out.............
ReplyDeleteShe stepped into the wardrobe, the soft heavy coats brushed against her fair skin. Lucy walked further into the wardrobe, to her amazement, it seemed never ending . Unexpectedly, Lucy stepped into something soft, wet and cold, simultaneously something prickly, cold and bumpy pierced her hand.
Swiftly, Lucy spun round to find herself in a thick pine forest , engulfed in a white blanket of snow. In a state of disbelief, absent mindedly she was drawn to a dull yellow light that shone upon the snow. She stood under the light source which
a lamp post. Suddenly, the silence was broken with the russerling of leave. Her eyes scanned every corner but no creature was found.
Then her eyes met with another pair . WHAT was this dreadful creature ? Twas half man , half Goat. Both let out a yelp for help.
Lucy saw a tall, long thing with a white sheet on it. She pulled the white sheet off and found a wardrobe. She stepped into it with excitement and she walked backwards until she felt somehing. She turned around then she found a snowy forrest. She could not believe her eyes. She walked down the middle and saw a lamp post with a candle in It. Suddenly she heard foot steps like animals walking. Then someone appeared with goat legs and a red scarf and was holding boxes. Lucy screamed and hid behind the lamp post. Soon after Lucy came out from behind the lamp post and bravely helped Mr Tummnus, the half man, half goat. She picked up the boxes he had dropped and spoke to Mr Tummnus. Mr Tummnus asked if Lucy would like to come to tea with him and Lucy agreed.
ReplyDelete